Primary-care doc thinks Berkeley Heart Labs is a good idea. I'll be doing them next week. She thinks if I was going to lose my hair like my uncle did, it would have happened immediately, and she lectured me about the positives of the statin drugs, but conceded that having these tests done and assessed by the specialist would be a good choice before resuming them. So I'm off the hook for a few weeks.
I got a start date for my job today: June 1.
Now I'm off to Vegas for several days, and I've never been. I don't gamble, but I AM going to see Cher! I heard she does "Love is a Battlefield" in this show--will it top Mr. Garrison's version on "South Park"? Stay tuned....
Friday, May 14, 2010
Thursday, May 13, 2010
9-month post-op with nutritionist
I saw my nutritionist today, which was interesting. I weighed 204 in their office, which was the lowest weight I've posted thus far. Our conversation was mostly the same stuff; we went over my bloodwork, and her response to my "elevated" folate and B-12 was to say, "That just shows me you're taking your vitamins like you should! That doesn't cause any adverse effects to you at all."
We discussed my still-high cholesterol; the center has an ARNP on staff that specializes in metabolic syndrome and cardiovascular disease, and she can do a workup called the Berkeley HeartLab Cardiovascular Tests. They draw your blood (which has to be frozen and shipped to Berkeley, CA, hence the name) and do genetic testing to determine exactly how your cholesterol is high and specific treatment your body will respond to. It also makes it possible to determine how to tailor your eating habits to your genotype for the healthiest dietary choices you can possibly make for yourself. This is their website:
http://www.4myheart.com/
Their phone number is (800) 432-7889. They have a special kit to take to the lab where the blood is drawn that includes their specific vials and such. Usually detailed bloodwork of this nature is extremely costly, but apparently it is their policy that even if it is not covered by insurance, it will not cost any more than $150.00 out of pocket. It does have to be done through a participating physician from the looks of the website.
I am going to discuss it with my primary-care doctor tomorrow, but I think it would be $150.00 well spent in my case--especially since I just found out from one of my uncles that statin drugs exacerbated his alopecia areata to the point that he lost every hair on his head (including eyebrows and eyelashes) as well as much of his body hair, even leg and arm hair. He joked that it made him look like he had mange! I really,really don't want that to happen to me! Apparently, cholesterol and hair are intrinsically linked in general. I had no idea--and his doctor prescribed Lipitor and didn't bother to share that particular side effect, if she even knew about it herself!
The one thing that made me nuts today at the nutritionist was the calorie-counting conversation we had. In yesterday's vent on this blog, I said I would have to eat 1500 calories a day for the rest of my life. When I said something to her about it, she told me she actually recommends that people try to stay between 800 and 1000 calories during the first two years after surgery and between 1200 and 1500 calories per day thereafter for maintenance. I politely blew my stack. 800 CALORIES A DAY? What is that, like four protein drinks and half a banana? I've been on as low as 1000/day and that urged me to kill (of course, I was a teenager and living mostly on SlimFast, but still). I told her I'd shoot for the 1200 but that was the best I could do, as I have to live in the actual world. She said something along the lines of, "Well, if you get dizzy or anything, you should eat more." I (barely) refrained from spouting, "DUH!" I just reminded her that as a former eating-disorder sufferer, I knew all too well about how it physically feels to starve myself. Sheesh!
Since my weight is still going down, we basically concluded that all is well. That was basically it. My next appointment with both her and the surgeon is my year surgery anniversary.
We discussed my still-high cholesterol; the center has an ARNP on staff that specializes in metabolic syndrome and cardiovascular disease, and she can do a workup called the Berkeley HeartLab Cardiovascular Tests. They draw your blood (which has to be frozen and shipped to Berkeley, CA, hence the name) and do genetic testing to determine exactly how your cholesterol is high and specific treatment your body will respond to. It also makes it possible to determine how to tailor your eating habits to your genotype for the healthiest dietary choices you can possibly make for yourself. This is their website:
http://www.4myheart.com/
Their phone number is (800) 432-7889. They have a special kit to take to the lab where the blood is drawn that includes their specific vials and such. Usually detailed bloodwork of this nature is extremely costly, but apparently it is their policy that even if it is not covered by insurance, it will not cost any more than $150.00 out of pocket. It does have to be done through a participating physician from the looks of the website.
I am going to discuss it with my primary-care doctor tomorrow, but I think it would be $150.00 well spent in my case--especially since I just found out from one of my uncles that statin drugs exacerbated his alopecia areata to the point that he lost every hair on his head (including eyebrows and eyelashes) as well as much of his body hair, even leg and arm hair. He joked that it made him look like he had mange! I really,really don't want that to happen to me! Apparently, cholesterol and hair are intrinsically linked in general. I had no idea--and his doctor prescribed Lipitor and didn't bother to share that particular side effect, if she even knew about it herself!
The one thing that made me nuts today at the nutritionist was the calorie-counting conversation we had. In yesterday's vent on this blog, I said I would have to eat 1500 calories a day for the rest of my life. When I said something to her about it, she told me she actually recommends that people try to stay between 800 and 1000 calories during the first two years after surgery and between 1200 and 1500 calories per day thereafter for maintenance. I politely blew my stack. 800 CALORIES A DAY? What is that, like four protein drinks and half a banana? I've been on as low as 1000/day and that urged me to kill (of course, I was a teenager and living mostly on SlimFast, but still). I told her I'd shoot for the 1200 but that was the best I could do, as I have to live in the actual world. She said something along the lines of, "Well, if you get dizzy or anything, you should eat more." I (barely) refrained from spouting, "DUH!" I just reminded her that as a former eating-disorder sufferer, I knew all too well about how it physically feels to starve myself. Sheesh!
Since my weight is still going down, we basically concluded that all is well. That was basically it. My next appointment with both her and the surgeon is my year surgery anniversary.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
"Easy way out, my dimpled badonkadonk!"
I had a good workout this morning and I feel fantastic! I keep trying other DVDs but so far, end up going back to Mr. Simmons--glitter, 'fro, and all. Goofy as he is, I can keep up with him, I usually like the music, and the workouts are fun.
I usually don't play favorites in any arena, but I have to say that my favorite blogger is Lyn, whose blog is Escape from Obesity and I recommend it highly:
http://escapefromobesity.blogspot.com/
She blogged the other day about people talking about weight-loss surgery as the easy way out. I've said many of these things I'm about to say previously on this blog, but I am going to repost a paraphrased version of my comments to her simply because I get so very tired of hearing this crap--which, in my experience, 95% of the time from people who have never struggled with their weight (and the other 5% just have Issues).
I tried EVERYTHING to lose weight. All my life. From "healthy" doctor-supervised diet and exercise programs to having a full-blown eating disorder (and I exercised then, too). I have the most success (by and thus far) with my gastric bypass at 9 months out (also including healthy diet and exercise), but the true test will be when I am two years out, five years out, and so forth. The adjustments I have made to better my lifestyle cannot end or my progress will stop or even reverse itself, and I am getting older and my metabolism is slowing down just like every other human life form on Earth.
I used to be TOTALLY anti-bariatric surgery when it came to me. I researched it and struggled with the decision to have it for ten years. It was not something I undertook lightly, in large part because I wanted to make sure I was not doing it because I hated myself or thought I needed anyone's approval.
My lab work and other vitals have to be monitored frequently, I have to exercise regularly, and it is my understanding that I have to eat and drink no more than approximately 1500 calories a day for the rest of my life--and that's 1500 calories of the limited foods my body can comfortably digest now, which leaves out anything breaded, bread itself, meat that isn't ground, anything fried, the majority of dairy, pizza, the majority of alcoholic beverages, etc. etc. etc. As of today, the majority of my food intake is protein shakes and South Beach protein bars. And you know what? I'm happy to make these choices and would do it all again in a heartbeat.
Do I think weight-loss surgery is the ONLY way? Absolutely NOT. I have nothing but respect and admiration for those who are able to lose weight with diet and exercise alone. It is DAMN HARD. I tried it many times, and I was never able to get below 250 pounds. (I have genetic predisposition, hormonal wackness, and I am over 40; perhaps that is why. Who KNOWS why? It just didn't work for me.)
Do some people use weight-loss surgery for the wrong reasons? ABSOLUTELY--and it blows up in their faces when they do. I have met many wonderful, noble folks who have been there, people who are still struggling valiantly to make their lives healthier and better--just as I am, just as the people who go to groups are, just as the people who are doing meal plans are, just as people who are doing diet and exercise alone are.
What deserves admiration and respect is still being in the fight. Still trying. Still learning. Still going back to the healthy stuff after a setback. Examining your own darkness and leaning toward the light. Acknowledging the experiences of others as valid even though they may be worlds apart from your own. We're not so very different after all; we all have our rocks to keep rolling up that hill in this life.
There is no easy way out of ANYTHING, ever. The only way out is through.
I usually don't play favorites in any arena, but I have to say that my favorite blogger is Lyn, whose blog is Escape from Obesity and I recommend it highly:
http://escapefromobesity.blogspot.com/
She blogged the other day about people talking about weight-loss surgery as the easy way out. I've said many of these things I'm about to say previously on this blog, but I am going to repost a paraphrased version of my comments to her simply because I get so very tired of hearing this crap--which, in my experience, 95% of the time from people who have never struggled with their weight (and the other 5% just have Issues).
I tried EVERYTHING to lose weight. All my life. From "healthy" doctor-supervised diet and exercise programs to having a full-blown eating disorder (and I exercised then, too). I have the most success (by and thus far) with my gastric bypass at 9 months out (also including healthy diet and exercise), but the true test will be when I am two years out, five years out, and so forth. The adjustments I have made to better my lifestyle cannot end or my progress will stop or even reverse itself, and I am getting older and my metabolism is slowing down just like every other human life form on Earth.
I used to be TOTALLY anti-bariatric surgery when it came to me. I researched it and struggled with the decision to have it for ten years. It was not something I undertook lightly, in large part because I wanted to make sure I was not doing it because I hated myself or thought I needed anyone's approval.
My lab work and other vitals have to be monitored frequently, I have to exercise regularly, and it is my understanding that I have to eat and drink no more than approximately 1500 calories a day for the rest of my life--and that's 1500 calories of the limited foods my body can comfortably digest now, which leaves out anything breaded, bread itself, meat that isn't ground, anything fried, the majority of dairy, pizza, the majority of alcoholic beverages, etc. etc. etc. As of today, the majority of my food intake is protein shakes and South Beach protein bars. And you know what? I'm happy to make these choices and would do it all again in a heartbeat.
Do I think weight-loss surgery is the ONLY way? Absolutely NOT. I have nothing but respect and admiration for those who are able to lose weight with diet and exercise alone. It is DAMN HARD. I tried it many times, and I was never able to get below 250 pounds. (I have genetic predisposition, hormonal wackness, and I am over 40; perhaps that is why. Who KNOWS why? It just didn't work for me.)
Do some people use weight-loss surgery for the wrong reasons? ABSOLUTELY--and it blows up in their faces when they do. I have met many wonderful, noble folks who have been there, people who are still struggling valiantly to make their lives healthier and better--just as I am, just as the people who go to groups are, just as the people who are doing meal plans are, just as people who are doing diet and exercise alone are.
What deserves admiration and respect is still being in the fight. Still trying. Still learning. Still going back to the healthy stuff after a setback. Examining your own darkness and leaning toward the light. Acknowledging the experiences of others as valid even though they may be worlds apart from your own. We're not so very different after all; we all have our rocks to keep rolling up that hill in this life.
There is no easy way out of ANYTHING, ever. The only way out is through.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
9 months post-op with bariatric surgeon
In summary: he concluded that I have lost 71 pounds total (still 91 since my highest weight--that's the number I tell people, with that caveat), seven pounds since the last visit three months ago, so I'm still about where I should be. If I want to lose it faster, I have to exercise more often. (I've been managing once or twice a week.) My cholesterol is still high, and since I can no longer ingest any food that would cause it to be that way--and haven't been able to for months--so it has to be genetic. I'm taking chromium and niacin as well. It IS lower than it was when I went on cholesterol meds lo those many years ago, but it's still really high. (276, I think he said. My primary care physician is going to ream me and make me go back on the freakin' statins. Sigh.)
Usually, I am a big fan of nurses in general (especially Nurse Jackie!) but the one today annoyed the bejesus out of me, clucking over my lab results because my "folate and vitamin B-12 are ELEVATED". Riddle me this, Nurse Never-Seen-You-Before-In-My-Life, what dire consequences could such elevation bring forth? (I see the nutritionist Thursday, I'm sure SHE'LL tell me...) If it means I have to buy a reduced quantity of expensive bariatric vitamins, I shall dance a joyous jiggly-jig with unchecked abandon. Sometimes I think these people grasp for clucking material so they don't have to connect with you on any level beyond the blood-pressure cuff, or maybe they feel like they haven't justified your co-pay unless you get some kind of feedback (where most doctors seem as though they could care less, but that's another issue altogether).
Well, hmpf. I didn't sleep well last night, and from the sounds of it, it would appear that I am a touch grumpy. :)
So, I will conclude with good and positive things: beautiful sunny day, I loved my Visio class and taking classes again PERIOD, and I bought something to wear at Costco the other day and I didn't have to buy the biggest size they had for the first time since high school!!! I was scanning some old pictures last night and couldn't help but notice how much better I look now than I did even for most of my 20s. I look healthier and happier (probably because I am definitively both of these). I cannot retrieve my less-weathered skin from days of yore, but it IS clearer now; I've had lasik so no more Coke-bottle specs; and best of all, I found my Mr. Salted. I'm not fatter, but I'm definitely sassier. ;)
Usually, I am a big fan of nurses in general (especially Nurse Jackie!) but the one today annoyed the bejesus out of me, clucking over my lab results because my "folate and vitamin B-12 are ELEVATED". Riddle me this, Nurse Never-Seen-You-Before-In-My-Life, what dire consequences could such elevation bring forth? (I see the nutritionist Thursday, I'm sure SHE'LL tell me...) If it means I have to buy a reduced quantity of expensive bariatric vitamins, I shall dance a joyous jiggly-jig with unchecked abandon. Sometimes I think these people grasp for clucking material so they don't have to connect with you on any level beyond the blood-pressure cuff, or maybe they feel like they haven't justified your co-pay unless you get some kind of feedback (where most doctors seem as though they could care less, but that's another issue altogether).
Well, hmpf. I didn't sleep well last night, and from the sounds of it, it would appear that I am a touch grumpy. :)
So, I will conclude with good and positive things: beautiful sunny day, I loved my Visio class and taking classes again PERIOD, and I bought something to wear at Costco the other day and I didn't have to buy the biggest size they had for the first time since high school!!! I was scanning some old pictures last night and couldn't help but notice how much better I look now than I did even for most of my 20s. I look healthier and happier (probably because I am definitively both of these). I cannot retrieve my less-weathered skin from days of yore, but it IS clearer now; I've had lasik so no more Coke-bottle specs; and best of all, I found my Mr. Salted. I'm not fatter, but I'm definitely sassier. ;)
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Recent stuff
Yeah, yeah, it's Mother's Day. Not my favorite. My blog about it last year says all I have to say on that subject. I should be doing something productive today, but I got sick this week and have taken it easy all weekend. Mr. Salted and I watched "Whip It" last night and enjoyed it, which surprised me; I wasn't all that enamored of the book, but the movie had a great cast. We were in the mood for something fairly light, and it sufficed. It was fun to see Betty White on Saturday Night Live last night, too. Mr. Salted's mother has Alzheimer's disease and lives in a facility out of state, so this isn't his favorite day, either. I called my grandmother and sent her a card. She is doing as well as can be expected, and my uncles are taking care of her, which has been such a load off my shoulders. I call her about once a week, and send her a lot of little cards that don't say much.
I got a job with a very well-regarded Internet company. It starts in the next few weeks--I've accepted the position and done the paperwork with the staffing agency, but it was a mass hire (400+ people) and something like 80 of them will start each week, so I haven't gotten my firm start date as of yet. It's just a contract job for a minimum of one year (maximum of two) but it's also a foot in the door and I'm really happy to have it. I really enjoyed working in the tech industry in the past and that's where I'd like the rest of my career to be.
On that note, I took my first continuing-ed class on the way to a Technical Writing Certificate Wednesday. It was a level 2 Microsoft Word 2007 class, and a good way to dip my foot back in the educational pool. I'm a fairly adept Word user, but got to learn about all kinds of cool stuff the software can do now. It's come a long way since 1995, when the kids at my university were teaching it to me in the computer lab--I was six to eight years older than they were, and at times like that I felt as though they thought of me as a pet ("look at the old person learning computers!"). I still had an electric typewriter, and it was 1996. Ah, good times.
So the Word 2007 class was cool--I think there were eight people in it. I was neither the oldest nor the youngest there, and it was fun talking to the other people there about how they used Word and what they did for a living. I like continuing ed--it's geared toward working people (read: grounded in reality). The classes are small and the atmosphere is very laid-back. I take a Visio class this coming week. That one meets twice for four hours, which will be a lot easier than meeting once for eight--that was a bit of a marathon, and I think that's how I ended up sick. I think it was just that and the finally getting a job and my body just said, Okay, you're down now, REST.
My weight hasn't really changed much. I stay between 205 and 208. I think I worked out once this week, and my eating is fine, nothing out of the ordinary. I went through my clothes today and things are still shifting around, albeit slowly. I have a couple of things that fit with no X in the size, which is nothing short of amazing! Most of my stuff is 18s but some of the 16s fit or nearly fit. My stomach remains my biggest (literally and figuratively) nemesis. I can literally get all of me except my stomach into a pair of size 14 jeans. I want to know why they can't just do a tummy tuck NOW. Hmpf.
I got a job with a very well-regarded Internet company. It starts in the next few weeks--I've accepted the position and done the paperwork with the staffing agency, but it was a mass hire (400+ people) and something like 80 of them will start each week, so I haven't gotten my firm start date as of yet. It's just a contract job for a minimum of one year (maximum of two) but it's also a foot in the door and I'm really happy to have it. I really enjoyed working in the tech industry in the past and that's where I'd like the rest of my career to be.
On that note, I took my first continuing-ed class on the way to a Technical Writing Certificate Wednesday. It was a level 2 Microsoft Word 2007 class, and a good way to dip my foot back in the educational pool. I'm a fairly adept Word user, but got to learn about all kinds of cool stuff the software can do now. It's come a long way since 1995, when the kids at my university were teaching it to me in the computer lab--I was six to eight years older than they were, and at times like that I felt as though they thought of me as a pet ("look at the old person learning computers!"). I still had an electric typewriter, and it was 1996. Ah, good times.
So the Word 2007 class was cool--I think there were eight people in it. I was neither the oldest nor the youngest there, and it was fun talking to the other people there about how they used Word and what they did for a living. I like continuing ed--it's geared toward working people (read: grounded in reality). The classes are small and the atmosphere is very laid-back. I take a Visio class this coming week. That one meets twice for four hours, which will be a lot easier than meeting once for eight--that was a bit of a marathon, and I think that's how I ended up sick. I think it was just that and the finally getting a job and my body just said, Okay, you're down now, REST.
My weight hasn't really changed much. I stay between 205 and 208. I think I worked out once this week, and my eating is fine, nothing out of the ordinary. I went through my clothes today and things are still shifting around, albeit slowly. I have a couple of things that fit with no X in the size, which is nothing short of amazing! Most of my stuff is 18s but some of the 16s fit or nearly fit. My stomach remains my biggest (literally and figuratively) nemesis. I can literally get all of me except my stomach into a pair of size 14 jeans. I want to know why they can't just do a tummy tuck NOW. Hmpf.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Life's blood
I earmarked last Monday for my latest fasting blood draw, as I have two nine-month post-op appointments coming up. When I'm due for a fasting blood draw, I try to have a snack at late as I'm allowed (usually 10 PM) so I'm not gnawing my arm (or anyone else's) off by the time the blood is taken. I also try to sleep soundly (not that I can dictate that per se, but an Advil PM or Benadryl can add a protective layer to my prescription sleep aids) so that I don't wake up and want food during the night. I managed all of the above and showed up at the lab, but couldn't find the orders from the bariatric surgeon. (I had the orders from my primary care doctor, but she tracks some additional levels above and beyond what the bariatric surgeon tracks.) I begged the tech to take an extra vial or two and told her I would get in touch with the surgeon for the levels they needed. She said she would need actual paper orders from the bariatric surgeon, and I said that was fine, I would go and get them, but it would be nice to be able to eat before I (a) passed out behind the wheel or (b) killed something, because it would take an hour or two to get there and back. She took some extra blood, I went on my merry way, and came back with the necessary paperwork. Of course, one of the vials from the morning draw should have been protected from light and hadn't been, so I had to offer up the other arm for a second draw. The first one hadn't hurt; the second one was painful. A total of eight vials were drawn. I was exhausted, but knew I still had to go to the store.
The last stretch of road to the store is on a two-lane highway. It was almost noon by then, sunny and lovely. I was out of it from blood-giving, drinking a protein drink, trying to stay awake, grumbling internally to myself as I tend to do at such times, when I saw two sets of flashing lights on the shoulder to my right. One set was on an ordinary-looking truck, the other on an average sedan, neither of which I would have ever earmarked as any kind of official vehicle. Two men stood between the vehicles talking above a dead boy on the pavement.
The kid appeared to be in his teens or early 20s. There was no blood or anything--he just looked asleep, but extremely asleep, very still. He was wearing a hoodie, jeans and sneakers, and the men standing beside him weren't making any effort to administer to him at all. I was surprised they hadn't covered at least his face; it seemed obscene somehow that he was just lying there exposed like that. My guess is that they were waiting for paramedics and/or police.
Seeing that jolted me out of myself immediately. I'm not a follower of any particular faith, but I said something like a prayer, hoping someone was listening: that he would get where he was going on his next journey safely. I wondered if he had a family, and I thought about them, about how we all started out with a family, at least in theory--how everyone was once somebody's child. I wondered why it was his time, and not mine.
I've wondered that many times in my life: why was it my mother, my best friend, someone else's treasured parent or child, my child. Why I remain.
Several years ago when I was in the throes of rather severe depression, I witnessed a similar incident while driving--similar in the thoughts it inspired me to think, anyway. I was driving down a highway--another rural highway, though not the same one--and the car immediately parallel to me (or a little ahead of me) in the lane to my right swerved off the road suddenly without slowing down at all. Most of this particular highway was bordered by grassy hillside, but this car managed to run smack into a concrete underpass at what looked like full speed. Pieces of the car flew everywhere; one hit my front bumper and left a mark that remains to this day. I looked in my rear-view mirror, contemplating going back, but people had already pulled over to help. I was late for an appointment, and I just kept going, as if in a daze. (I was in a daze; I was in a daze for three or four years, and this happened during that time.) I read a couple of days later in the paper that the driver had died on impact, and that he was younger than I.
It literally felt like a hand had come out of the sky and plucked that person from the Earth, close enough for me to see it happen. I wondered then, as now, why it was him and not me, and it shook me up, but in a positive way--it made me realize how very much I still want to live, and to be grateful that I still had the chance.
The last stretch of road to the store is on a two-lane highway. It was almost noon by then, sunny and lovely. I was out of it from blood-giving, drinking a protein drink, trying to stay awake, grumbling internally to myself as I tend to do at such times, when I saw two sets of flashing lights on the shoulder to my right. One set was on an ordinary-looking truck, the other on an average sedan, neither of which I would have ever earmarked as any kind of official vehicle. Two men stood between the vehicles talking above a dead boy on the pavement.
The kid appeared to be in his teens or early 20s. There was no blood or anything--he just looked asleep, but extremely asleep, very still. He was wearing a hoodie, jeans and sneakers, and the men standing beside him weren't making any effort to administer to him at all. I was surprised they hadn't covered at least his face; it seemed obscene somehow that he was just lying there exposed like that. My guess is that they were waiting for paramedics and/or police.
Seeing that jolted me out of myself immediately. I'm not a follower of any particular faith, but I said something like a prayer, hoping someone was listening: that he would get where he was going on his next journey safely. I wondered if he had a family, and I thought about them, about how we all started out with a family, at least in theory--how everyone was once somebody's child. I wondered why it was his time, and not mine.
I've wondered that many times in my life: why was it my mother, my best friend, someone else's treasured parent or child, my child. Why I remain.
Several years ago when I was in the throes of rather severe depression, I witnessed a similar incident while driving--similar in the thoughts it inspired me to think, anyway. I was driving down a highway--another rural highway, though not the same one--and the car immediately parallel to me (or a little ahead of me) in the lane to my right swerved off the road suddenly without slowing down at all. Most of this particular highway was bordered by grassy hillside, but this car managed to run smack into a concrete underpass at what looked like full speed. Pieces of the car flew everywhere; one hit my front bumper and left a mark that remains to this day. I looked in my rear-view mirror, contemplating going back, but people had already pulled over to help. I was late for an appointment, and I just kept going, as if in a daze. (I was in a daze; I was in a daze for three or four years, and this happened during that time.) I read a couple of days later in the paper that the driver had died on impact, and that he was younger than I.
It literally felt like a hand had come out of the sky and plucked that person from the Earth, close enough for me to see it happen. I wondered then, as now, why it was him and not me, and it shook me up, but in a positive way--it made me realize how very much I still want to live, and to be grateful that I still had the chance.
Lack of sleep linked to early death: study (reposted from Yahoo)
Wed May 5, 9:44 am ET
LONDON (AFP) – People who get less than six hours sleep per night have an increased risk of dying prematurely, researchers said on Wednesday.
Those who slumbered for less than that amount of time were 12 percent more likely to die early, though researchers also found a link between sleeping more than nine hours and premature death.
"If you sleep little, you can develop diabetes, obesity, hypertension and high cholesterol," Francesco Cappuccio, who led research on the subject at Britain's University of Warwick, told AFP.
The study, conducted with the Federico II University in Naples, Italy, aggregated decade-long studies from around the world involving more than 1.3 million people and found "unequivocal evidence of the direct link" between lack of sleep and premature death.
"We think that the relation between little sleep and illness is due to a series of hormonal and metabolical mechanisms," Cappuccio said.
The findings of the study were published in the Sleep journal.
Cappuccio believes the duration of sleep is a public health issue and should be considered as a behavioral risk factor by doctors.
"Society pushes us to sleep less and less," Cappuccio said, adding that about 20 percent of the population in the United States and Britain sleeps less than five hours.
Sleeping less than six hours is "more common amongst full-time workers, suggesting that it may be due to societal pressures for longer working hours and more shift work"
The study also found a link between sleeping more than nine hours per night and premature death, but Cappuccio said oversleeping is more likely to be an effect of illness, rather than a cause.
"Doctors never ask how much one sleeps, but that could be an indicator that something is wrong," said Cappuccio, who heads the Sleep, Health and Society Programme at the University of Warwick.
Research showed no adverse effects for those sleeping between six and eight hours per day.
LONDON (AFP) – People who get less than six hours sleep per night have an increased risk of dying prematurely, researchers said on Wednesday.
Those who slumbered for less than that amount of time were 12 percent more likely to die early, though researchers also found a link between sleeping more than nine hours and premature death.
"If you sleep little, you can develop diabetes, obesity, hypertension and high cholesterol," Francesco Cappuccio, who led research on the subject at Britain's University of Warwick, told AFP.
The study, conducted with the Federico II University in Naples, Italy, aggregated decade-long studies from around the world involving more than 1.3 million people and found "unequivocal evidence of the direct link" between lack of sleep and premature death.
"We think that the relation between little sleep and illness is due to a series of hormonal and metabolical mechanisms," Cappuccio said.
The findings of the study were published in the Sleep journal.
Cappuccio believes the duration of sleep is a public health issue and should be considered as a behavioral risk factor by doctors.
"Society pushes us to sleep less and less," Cappuccio said, adding that about 20 percent of the population in the United States and Britain sleeps less than five hours.
Sleeping less than six hours is "more common amongst full-time workers, suggesting that it may be due to societal pressures for longer working hours and more shift work"
The study also found a link between sleeping more than nine hours per night and premature death, but Cappuccio said oversleeping is more likely to be an effect of illness, rather than a cause.
"Doctors never ask how much one sleeps, but that could be an indicator that something is wrong," said Cappuccio, who heads the Sleep, Health and Society Programme at the University of Warwick.
Research showed no adverse effects for those sleeping between six and eight hours per day.
Monday, May 3, 2010
Bullies Target Obese Kids (reposted from Yahoo)
By Serena Gordon, HealthDay Reporter
MONDAY, May 3, 2010 (HealthDay News)
For kids, a few extra pounds may invite trouble from the schoolyard bully.
New research suggests that just being overweight increases the risk of being bullied. And factors that usually play a role in the risk of being bullied, such as gender, race and family income levels, don't seem to matter if you're overweight -- being overweight or obese trumps all those other factors when it comes to aggressive behavior from other children.
The study found that being overweight increased the risk of being the target of bullying by 63 percent.
"One of the reasons we started this study is that obesity is so much more common today. Now that about half of kids are overweight or obese, it doesn't make you such an outlier anymore, so we thought maybe kids wouldn't be bullied for being overweight anymore," said study author Dr. Julie Lumeng, an assistant research scientist at the Center for Human Growth and Development at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor. She added that the researchers also hoped they might be able to find some protective factors against being bullied, such as doing well in school.
"What we found, much to our dismay, was that nothing seemed to matter. If you were obese, you were more likely to be bullied, no matter what," she said.
Results of the study will be published in the June issue of Pediatrics, but were released online May 3.
The study included 821 boys and girls from a nationally representative sample of children selected from 10 sites around the United States. Bullying behaviors were assessed in third, fifth and sixth grades. The youngsters were mostly white, half of them were male and 15 percent were overweight in the third grade.
By sixth grade, teachers reported that 34 percent of the study children had been bullied, and mothers reported that 45 percent of the children had been bullied, while 25 percent of the children themselves said they had been bullied.
Previous research has shown that boys, minorities and children from low-income groups are more likely to be bullied, so the researchers took these factors into account to see if they made a difference. The study authors also considered a child's social skills and academic achievement in their analysis.
"No matter how much we retested, the findings were very robust. Obese kids are more likely to be bullied," said Lumeng.
She said that one of the reasons she believes the findings were so consistent is that prejudice against overweight or obese people is "so pervasive that it's acceptable." But, she added, "Obesity is really complex. It's not all about willpower. It's a brain-based disorder, and I hope that message becomes clearer."
Dana Rofey, an assistant professor with the Weight Management and Wellness Center at Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh, said she wasn't surprised by the findings. "Bullying is the most common psychosocial complaint that our patients present with," she said.
"For parents and pediatricians, one of the issues our study raises is that if you're caring for a child who's overweight, you need to be alert to this and you might want to gently bring it up with the child. Ask, 'How are things at school going?' or 'Does anyone ever say something that makes you feel bad?' because this may be an issue that's difficult for kids to bring up," said Lumeng.
If your child lets you know that he or she is being bullied, Lumeng said your first response should be to validate your child's feelings and let them know that it's not OK for someone to treat them like that.
What to do next can be tricky, agreed both experts.
"Be supportive, and let your child know that you'll help them. Consult with your child and ask how he or she would like you to get involved," advised Rofey. Many youngsters may ask their parents to take a hands-off approach, she said. But she recommends setting some guidelines. "Say something like, 'It seems you have this under control right now, but let's keep talking and checking in about it.'"
Rofey also recommends teaching your child how to avoid situations that might lead to teasing or bullying, and talking with your child about how to reach out to adults if they need to. Depending on the situation, she said that parents may need to step in and advocate for their children at the school. But, she advised always letting your children know what steps you'll be taking.
MONDAY, May 3, 2010 (HealthDay News)
For kids, a few extra pounds may invite trouble from the schoolyard bully.
New research suggests that just being overweight increases the risk of being bullied. And factors that usually play a role in the risk of being bullied, such as gender, race and family income levels, don't seem to matter if you're overweight -- being overweight or obese trumps all those other factors when it comes to aggressive behavior from other children.
The study found that being overweight increased the risk of being the target of bullying by 63 percent.
"One of the reasons we started this study is that obesity is so much more common today. Now that about half of kids are overweight or obese, it doesn't make you such an outlier anymore, so we thought maybe kids wouldn't be bullied for being overweight anymore," said study author Dr. Julie Lumeng, an assistant research scientist at the Center for Human Growth and Development at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor. She added that the researchers also hoped they might be able to find some protective factors against being bullied, such as doing well in school.
"What we found, much to our dismay, was that nothing seemed to matter. If you were obese, you were more likely to be bullied, no matter what," she said.
Results of the study will be published in the June issue of Pediatrics, but were released online May 3.
The study included 821 boys and girls from a nationally representative sample of children selected from 10 sites around the United States. Bullying behaviors were assessed in third, fifth and sixth grades. The youngsters were mostly white, half of them were male and 15 percent were overweight in the third grade.
By sixth grade, teachers reported that 34 percent of the study children had been bullied, and mothers reported that 45 percent of the children had been bullied, while 25 percent of the children themselves said they had been bullied.
Previous research has shown that boys, minorities and children from low-income groups are more likely to be bullied, so the researchers took these factors into account to see if they made a difference. The study authors also considered a child's social skills and academic achievement in their analysis.
"No matter how much we retested, the findings were very robust. Obese kids are more likely to be bullied," said Lumeng.
She said that one of the reasons she believes the findings were so consistent is that prejudice against overweight or obese people is "so pervasive that it's acceptable." But, she added, "Obesity is really complex. It's not all about willpower. It's a brain-based disorder, and I hope that message becomes clearer."
Dana Rofey, an assistant professor with the Weight Management and Wellness Center at Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh, said she wasn't surprised by the findings. "Bullying is the most common psychosocial complaint that our patients present with," she said.
"For parents and pediatricians, one of the issues our study raises is that if you're caring for a child who's overweight, you need to be alert to this and you might want to gently bring it up with the child. Ask, 'How are things at school going?' or 'Does anyone ever say something that makes you feel bad?' because this may be an issue that's difficult for kids to bring up," said Lumeng.
If your child lets you know that he or she is being bullied, Lumeng said your first response should be to validate your child's feelings and let them know that it's not OK for someone to treat them like that.
What to do next can be tricky, agreed both experts.
"Be supportive, and let your child know that you'll help them. Consult with your child and ask how he or she would like you to get involved," advised Rofey. Many youngsters may ask their parents to take a hands-off approach, she said. But she recommends setting some guidelines. "Say something like, 'It seems you have this under control right now, but let's keep talking and checking in about it.'"
Rofey also recommends teaching your child how to avoid situations that might lead to teasing or bullying, and talking with your child about how to reach out to adults if they need to. Depending on the situation, she said that parents may need to step in and advocate for their children at the school. But, she advised always letting your children know what steps you'll be taking.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Shapewear
I have decided that modern-day shapewear is nothing short of magical.
Most of my adult life, I would do anything to avoid wearing nylons or tights--and they're pretty hard to find in a bricks-and-mortar store when you are size 3X or higher. Now I can buy them anywhere (sometimes with coupons!), and while I'm always glad to get out of them, they don't bother me nearly as much as they once did.
I have never liked clothing that was tight, fitted, or even semi-fitted. As I lose weight, I am becoming more comfortable with wearing clothes that actually fit--yet I still can't escape the recovering-bulimic voice in my head that says, "You need a bigger size. Hide. Hide. HIDE!!!! A tent with a hole for your head, that's what you need! You can't wear that in public! People will be able to make out the cellulite in your abdomen through the shirt!" and so forth. Sometimes she calls me the Baroness of Back Fat or some other sweet nothing. (I just now realized that the recovering-bulimic voice is a total bitch who just needs to chug a huge cup of shut the hell up.)
As time goes on, my skin is getting looser--the fat that remains is kind of moving around in there with room to spare. (I had to stop one of my cats from kneading my stomach the other day--apparently he found it of a pleasing consistency for that particular activity. Needless to say, I Was Not Amused.)
My grandmother made me try to wear an actual girdle once, sometime in my early to middle teens. I struggled into it, immediately unable to breathe. It was hot, it itched like hell, and it contained actual rubber , which ensured the garment provided the maximum amount of chafing per centimeter. (No wonder I rejected nylons, tights, and even slips the second I got a chance!) The whole "beauty is pain" mantra was never one I could embrace--my bullshit detector goes up to eleven. I knew the truth immediately: donning that slimming straitjacket didn't bring me one bit closer to beautiful, only a hell of a lot crankier--and every bit as lumpy--as before.
I tried wearing Spanx for my wedding to Mr. Salted three years ago--I was at my highest weight at the time. I was horribly self-conscious and uncomfortable all day. I was in a beautiful, simple dress, my hair and nails done, several people I loved dearly present. It should have been the happiest day of my life, and I was happy and very emotional, but my physical discomfort never completely left my mind the entire day. The Spanx didn't keep me from looking, or being, huge. (You can also see the line from them across my abdomen in the wedding pictures. Petty and vain as that is, it bothered me.) So wearing Spanx accomplished exactly nothing--but they aren't a magic wand, and I probably bought them too large to begin with. We should have just worn t-shirts and jeans and gone to the courthouse, but I wanted to show Mr. S I loved him by getting all dressed up for him (since I rarely ever do), and he looked very dapper in a suit. Unfortunately, all that my attempts at being a girly bride accomplished was to cause him to worry about my discomfort all day, too. Sigh.
Right now, I have a lot of clothes that technically FIT but I didn't like the way I looked in them, so I wouldn't wear them (visible cellulite, Baroness of Back Fat, etc.). So, I decided to give shapewear another try, 2010-style. I found a Maidenform "tummy-toning tank" at Costco (the package actually reads, "Fat Free Dressing"--aren't those marketing people witty?). Remarkably, I can honestly say that I LOVE THIS THING. It's comfortable, doesn't itch, it smooths everything down and keeps it in place so that I can wear clothes that fit--and they actually look decent. Yes, I am still fluffy/lumpy/grumpy, but at least I appear smooth and solid, with the possibility of a waist lurking somewhere under the surface.
Most of my adult life, I would do anything to avoid wearing nylons or tights--and they're pretty hard to find in a bricks-and-mortar store when you are size 3X or higher. Now I can buy them anywhere (sometimes with coupons!), and while I'm always glad to get out of them, they don't bother me nearly as much as they once did.
I have never liked clothing that was tight, fitted, or even semi-fitted. As I lose weight, I am becoming more comfortable with wearing clothes that actually fit--yet I still can't escape the recovering-bulimic voice in my head that says, "You need a bigger size. Hide. Hide. HIDE!!!! A tent with a hole for your head, that's what you need! You can't wear that in public! People will be able to make out the cellulite in your abdomen through the shirt!" and so forth. Sometimes she calls me the Baroness of Back Fat or some other sweet nothing. (I just now realized that the recovering-bulimic voice is a total bitch who just needs to chug a huge cup of shut the hell up.)
As time goes on, my skin is getting looser--the fat that remains is kind of moving around in there with room to spare. (I had to stop one of my cats from kneading my stomach the other day--apparently he found it of a pleasing consistency for that particular activity. Needless to say, I Was Not Amused.)
My grandmother made me try to wear an actual girdle once, sometime in my early to middle teens. I struggled into it, immediately unable to breathe. It was hot, it itched like hell, and it contained actual rubber , which ensured the garment provided the maximum amount of chafing per centimeter. (No wonder I rejected nylons, tights, and even slips the second I got a chance!) The whole "beauty is pain" mantra was never one I could embrace--my bullshit detector goes up to eleven. I knew the truth immediately: donning that slimming straitjacket didn't bring me one bit closer to beautiful, only a hell of a lot crankier--and every bit as lumpy--as before.
I tried wearing Spanx for my wedding to Mr. Salted three years ago--I was at my highest weight at the time. I was horribly self-conscious and uncomfortable all day. I was in a beautiful, simple dress, my hair and nails done, several people I loved dearly present. It should have been the happiest day of my life, and I was happy and very emotional, but my physical discomfort never completely left my mind the entire day. The Spanx didn't keep me from looking, or being, huge. (You can also see the line from them across my abdomen in the wedding pictures. Petty and vain as that is, it bothered me.) So wearing Spanx accomplished exactly nothing--but they aren't a magic wand, and I probably bought them too large to begin with. We should have just worn t-shirts and jeans and gone to the courthouse, but I wanted to show Mr. S I loved him by getting all dressed up for him (since I rarely ever do), and he looked very dapper in a suit. Unfortunately, all that my attempts at being a girly bride accomplished was to cause him to worry about my discomfort all day, too. Sigh.
Right now, I have a lot of clothes that technically FIT but I didn't like the way I looked in them, so I wouldn't wear them (visible cellulite, Baroness of Back Fat, etc.). So, I decided to give shapewear another try, 2010-style. I found a Maidenform "tummy-toning tank" at Costco (the package actually reads, "Fat Free Dressing"--aren't those marketing people witty?). Remarkably, I can honestly say that I LOVE THIS THING. It's comfortable, doesn't itch, it smooths everything down and keeps it in place so that I can wear clothes that fit--and they actually look decent. Yes, I am still fluffy/lumpy/grumpy, but at least I appear smooth and solid, with the possibility of a waist lurking somewhere under the surface.
13 Things That Weight-Loss Surgery Has Made Possible (inspired by Thursday Thirteen)
1. Fitting into restaurant booths and chairs.
2. Being able to clean my house without getting as tired.
3. Walking further, dancing longer.
4. (Sadly) strangers are friendlier to me. I'm not hearing comments or noticing people sizing up my shopping cart.
5. Finding clothes at regular stores for cheap prices! I wore a dress to a job interview the other day that I got on the clearance rack at Target for $7 and it looked great. When I was heavier, the same dress probably would have cost $60--minimum.
6. I have more energy.
7. I smile more. I honestly feel happier.
8. I sleep better.
9. I'm more confident. Job interviews have definitely been easier.
10. My body doesn't feel like the enemy to the extent it once did. I still don't like it, and I still feel somewhat dissociated from it, but I feel so much better already. Which leads me to--
11. I'm physically more comfortable. Summer might not be as hellish as usual this year.
12. I wear clothes that fit and not clothes that are three sizes too big.
13. My feet got smaller.
2. Being able to clean my house without getting as tired.
3. Walking further, dancing longer.
4. (Sadly) strangers are friendlier to me. I'm not hearing comments or noticing people sizing up my shopping cart.
5. Finding clothes at regular stores for cheap prices! I wore a dress to a job interview the other day that I got on the clearance rack at Target for $7 and it looked great. When I was heavier, the same dress probably would have cost $60--minimum.
6. I have more energy.
7. I smile more. I honestly feel happier.
8. I sleep better.
9. I'm more confident. Job interviews have definitely been easier.
10. My body doesn't feel like the enemy to the extent it once did. I still don't like it, and I still feel somewhat dissociated from it, but I feel so much better already. Which leads me to--
11. I'm physically more comfortable. Summer might not be as hellish as usual this year.
12. I wear clothes that fit and not clothes that are three sizes too big.
13. My feet got smaller.
Saturday 9: Changes
1. Tell us about one thing that you'd change about yourself if you could.
My body.
2. Mattel decides to make a Barbie-like (or Ken-like) doll of you -- what would be the most important accessory or accessories they would absolutely have to package you with in order to portray your lifestyle?
Books.
3. Hey, do you like surprises? If yes, what kinds?
I HATE surprises!
4. What was the last snail mail that you received that was significant?
A friend sent me a lovely, encouraging card.
5. If you could pick out a brand new nickname for yourself, what would you choose and why?
The nicknames I have are just fine. Pzuzu is my favorite.
6. John Edward's mistress was on Oprah this past Thursday. She stated that no third person can break up a marriage, so it had to be broken before the two started doing the nasty. Do you buy that?
Actually, I do, not that it excuses anyone's behavior in that situation. I think infidelity is a symptom of underlying issues that aren't being addressed. Sleeping with someone else's spouse invites karma to bite you in the keester.
7. Do you think it is okay to keep secrets from your s/o?
Yes, sometimes, particularly if they are about the distant past.
8. Have you ever played Truth or Dare? If yes, what's the weirdest dare that you did?
Urinated on a church lawn at night.
9. What, in hindsight, the stupidest thing that you have ever done?
See #8--and I moved cross-country for a man once. I was young and stupid.
My body.
2. Mattel decides to make a Barbie-like (or Ken-like) doll of you -- what would be the most important accessory or accessories they would absolutely have to package you with in order to portray your lifestyle?
Books.
3. Hey, do you like surprises? If yes, what kinds?
I HATE surprises!
4. What was the last snail mail that you received that was significant?
A friend sent me a lovely, encouraging card.
5. If you could pick out a brand new nickname for yourself, what would you choose and why?
The nicknames I have are just fine. Pzuzu is my favorite.
6. John Edward's mistress was on Oprah this past Thursday. She stated that no third person can break up a marriage, so it had to be broken before the two started doing the nasty. Do you buy that?
Actually, I do, not that it excuses anyone's behavior in that situation. I think infidelity is a symptom of underlying issues that aren't being addressed. Sleeping with someone else's spouse invites karma to bite you in the keester.
7. Do you think it is okay to keep secrets from your s/o?
Yes, sometimes, particularly if they are about the distant past.
8. Have you ever played Truth or Dare? If yes, what's the weirdest dare that you did?
Urinated on a church lawn at night.
9. What, in hindsight, the stupidest thing that you have ever done?
See #8--and I moved cross-country for a man once. I was young and stupid.
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About Me
- Salted with Shadows
- Seattle, WA, United States
- This blog focuses largely on a personal journey to and through weight-loss surgery. It's also about reading, writing, animals, photography, love, humor, music, thinking out loud, and memes. In other words...life.
