Monday

I'm feeling pretty glum and trying not to. The sun is shining, and my incisions are healing and looking less like a horror movie, though I can tell I still have some healing to do inside my stomach--that still hurts. I'm watching Night 2 of the Women's National Gymnastics Championships. I've watched gymnastics since I was a little tiny girl--even tried to do gymnastics briefly, but the puberty fairy came early, tied one on and ended the suspense. There is no sport I was built for. I was also on the swim team briefly, and I love to swim to this day, but my physical body is incapable of moving quickly. Only my brain does.

I can't find the USB part of my wireless mouse, so I'm having to use the pad on the laptop--not my strong suit. I also can't find my new car tabs, which I paid for and which came in the mail and are somewhere in this house, where the piles of paper, no matter what size, turn into black holes simply by being.

Edit: found USB, found and installed car tabs.

Last night I was an idiot. Actually, I've been an idiot for a couple of days, and last night I got schooled. I'm supposed to be doing puree, and I ate a couple of things that were not technically puree, thinking if I chewed well enough, it would all be okay. Needless to say, it was not. It was fine for a couple of days, and then last night I attempted to eat a (boneless,skinless, moist) baked salmon fillet and got really sick. It felt like I had a 2x4 wedged horizontally in my chest cavity, and I couldn't breathe. It was terrifying. I just tried to breathe, tried not to panic, and threw up sporadically for about an hour. I scared the crap out of myself and Mr. Salted, and was really g-d annoyed with myself. And I still am.

All the instructions say that if you have any issues with vomiting, you should go back to liquid for a day or so. I see the nutritionist today and we'll be talking about it. Now I'm just worried I screwed myself up for good.